Sometimes, I felt the loneliest in a room full of people.
I’d try to talk, but the rejection I’d experienced kept pulling me backwards. Thoughts came through my mind like arrows, piercing my heart.
They don’t really like you, how could they?
You don’t really belong here.
Whey are you even here anyways?
Crying Out
I found myself constantly crying out to God, wondering if He’d ever heal me. “How Long Lord?” became a daily question. It gave me comfort to know that there was someone else who felt the same about what he was going through.
In psalm 13:2 King David says How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day?
NLT
It Felt Like Forever
For me, it felt like forever before any healing came.
But one day, at God’s leading, I took out a pen and paper, and I wrote:
The day will come.
The day will come when you will walk in healing.
The day will come when this anguish is but a memory.
The day will come when the promises of God are no longer just a hope, but a blessing you can see with your physical eyes.
How Long Lord?
You may feel as king David did, asking God,
How long Lord?
How long Lord, do I have to live with this hurt and rejection?
How long Lord, will the past hold me back from enjoying the present?
And the answer is, the day will come. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. Keep worshipping and finding comfort in God’s word. One day, you will walk right into the promises of God, and you will be carrying great treasures with you.
‘I will go before you
And make the crooked places straight;
I will break in pieces the gates of bronze
And cut the bars of iron.
I will give you the treasures of darkness
And hidden riches of secret places,
That you may know that I, the Lord,
Who call you by your name,
Am the God of Israel.
Isaiah 45:2-3 NKJV
In His Love,
Carolyn
© Carolyn Rice 2019
